NZNTM Season 3 Episode 4

New Zealand’s Next Top Model Season 3, Episode 4.

I can’t be bothered this week – I am blaming my lethargy on a Vitamim D deficiency (it’s mah new buzz phrase). So, I will do a quick Finn-on-Glee style rundown of “what you missed”.

Everyone is getting sick of Tyne and next week she storms out after AJ calls her a bitch. The girls did a posing challenge then went to the zoo to win the chance of being featured on the 2Degrees website. Arihana was one of the three, the other two don’t really count because she needs to win! Bianca is growing on me and it turns out her mum is/was a model so that must be why she is able to rock it in challenges depite being naturally awkward. The girls had to model with Vinnie a male model with a stupid ghoul tattoo on his chest and Yanna and Rosanagh reacted like he was water in the desert. Bianca said she felt she didn’t know how to pose with him as she has never had a boyfriend.
Brigette got picked first. Amber and Yanna were bottom two and Yanna went home.

And that’s what you missed on (*really high pitched*) NZNTM!

(Photo updates to come)

Brigette, Amber, Aroha, Brianna, Yanna, Arihana, Bianca, Rosanagh, Aminah, Hilary, AJ, Tyne, Issy and Holly.

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NZNTM Season 3 Episode 3

New Zealand’s Next Top Model Season 3, Episode 3.

Following on from the shock of Aminah being eliminated in the last episode the girls were all discussing how they all expected her to be around for a lot longer too. Many of them were also concerned as Aminah, it seems, used to do the cooking and now they will have to fend for themselves. With one egg, no cheese and some taco mix.

The girls were then off to meet Colin to learn about runway. Now, I really must be out of the loop because, following my not having heard of Model Teresa Moore in episode 1, I also have never heard of Penny Pickard “NZ’s most successful catwalk model”. (Where’s Rachel Hunter and Kylie Bax these days?!). The catwalk in this case was a big staircase that the girls had to sashay down. High heels + Stairs does not usually equal elegant walking. Bianca looked like she was about the cry and used the handrail while walking up the stairs. She claimed she didn’t know she was supposed to walk like a model on the way up. Colin told her to toughen up and that she didn’t want people laughing at her. I fear he may need to give her a few more talkings to yet though. Briana clomped up the stairs. Colin thought Aroha was a bit vacant and like a robot. Amber was too stiff. AJ was waaayy over the top with her hands on her hips and flicking her head as she turned at the end. Issy was too “fast” and “erratic”. Everyone else seemed to do quite well. Then they had to all do it again while wrapped tightly in a sheet that restricted their movement. Hilary was really good at the walk both times. AJ almost fell down the stairs.

Back at the house the drama has already begun. This is the reason that, when given the option of which school to start upon my arrival in NZ, I chose Co-Ed over a single sex school. Girls can be pretty stupid/scatty if we are honest. Tyne was in a mood with Holly for being friends with Hilary “She pretty much just pushed me aside”. Holly tried to talk to Tyne about it but she wouldn’t. Everyone thinks AJ is hilarious. I have a feeling she may be a little bit simple. “I only learnt how to say hippopotamus, like, the other week.” “What were you saying before?” “Hippo-ta-ta-ta. I thought that’s how you say it!”

Runway time! The girls walked in a Glassons fashion show. They were expected to do a few poses while walking too. Hilary did well. Arihana’s poses were a bit off – “Lose the circus freak”. Issy said she’s “not capable of walking in straight lines”. Colin said she was “Whitney Houston on crack”. (That would be normal Whitney then?) AJ came out, walked the wrong way round the runway and forgot to pose for the judges. Tyne was praised – “amazing”. Bianca started well but thought people were laughing at her so slinked off at the end dejected. Sara and Colin said that Rosanagh just glides down the runway and were very impressed. However, the winner of the challenge who got $1000 worth of clothing and the use of a new car for a year was Aroha.

Off for a photoshoot now – with boys! The girls had to model with other models wearing a dress that was like a shiny off-one-shoulder poncho. Briana was told to work on her “ice queen” face. When Amber was doing her shoot the male model next to her had to stand on a book as she was a whole head taller. Holly was “being out-modelled” and the photographer said he struggled to get a good shot. Issy didn’t do very well at all and blamed it on the dress.

At elimination Bianca got praised for her good week, so hopefully she will be less awkward next time. Amber was told that on the runway she was boring and the judges didn’t like her photo either. AJ proclaimed that she looked “really hot” in her photo. Then she cried again. Colin was not impressed at all with Holly this week. Yanna turned into a gibbering mess because she has a crush on one of the male models from the shoot. Issy said that she hated the runway, hated her dress at the photoshoot and acting sexy – “my head’s just not in the game.”

Top this week was Bianca!!!!
Bottom two were Holly and Issy. Holly went home – Mr Pigalina and I both said “awwww” and felt sad when she said “When I get back to Oamaru, I’ve got my job still open for me at Countdown, so I can go back there. So that’s sweet, looking forward to that.” Ommers! Countdown! 😦

Brigette, Amber, Aroha, Brianna, Yanna, Arihana, Bianca, Rosanagh, Aminah, Hilary, AJ, Tyne, Issy and Holly.

NZNTM Season 3 Episode 2

New Zealand’s Next Top Model Season 3, Episode 2.
(Warning – this post contains higher than usual levels of Pigalina life stories).

As I have been a little slow in updating this I had already accidentally seen who is eliminated in this episode before watching it. I must say I was surprised – let’s see how it came to be.
First, let me say how upset I am that the theme toon has changed! I loved the old one. The new one has someone muttering something that sounds like “models” and is otherwise non-descript. The opening credits has all of the girls walking around in a shower of bling and diamonds and getting their photos taken.

The girls all moved into their apartment and apparently they “had to” scream because they were so excited. They screamed lots. Free stuff for everyone, jewellery, clothes, phone, make-up. Then – SHOCK – there is a strange girl in the hot tub. Turns out that she is Holly who is the wildcard winner – she was chosen by the public to be in the competition. Bianca said that they were all prepared to hate her until they realised she is awesome, so that was lucky for Holly.

Makeover time! (The past few times that I have been to the Hairdresser I have asked them to Top Model makeover me and, without fail, I end up with a couple of highlights – which they do under my top layer of hair because they know I will be slack with maintainence – and a few layers. Every. Single. Time.).
At the hairdressers Colin was looking fly but Sara was wearing a fat ladies Royal Wedding souvenir t-shirt and a leopard cardi. The hairdresser man looked like a scruffy I.T technician (no offense to mah I.T nerds intended <3). (*Pigalina Tangent* Another pronunciation peeve of mine then occurred – see the last post for more – Sara said that they were all glad to have Holly HERE then said – speaking of HAIR… They are not the same word!! There is an awful ad on the radio at the mo that rhymes bear with rear and gear. Getting angry just thinking about it).
Anyway, I digresss. Everyone seemed pretty happy even Issy who has a huge shaved bit. Except for Tyne who said her hair was her identity and told Colin she felt ugly and like a boy. Yanna post make-over reminds me of Samantha Morton (growing her hair back after Minority Report).

Photoshoot time – Advertising Magnum Temptation Ice-Creams. My friend Belinda was not impressed by this shoot commenting that she thought it was poorly done. I can see what she meant – the make-up for most people was ick. Everyone was dressed like some kind of Austin Powers extra posing next to a swimming pool with a Magnum (I have 2 more Pigalina stories, this time about Magnum ice-creams. Scroll to the bottom if you care). Lots of chocolatey teeth followed. AJ prepared some lines “Even models give into temptation. Have a Magnum Temptation.” She missed the fact that it was not a TV ad – though good initiative.

Elimination time – Colin said Rosanagh’s photo was awful. AJ cried (and she hadn’t yet seen her no-eyes photo “Your face was a shambles”). She cried again when not eliminated. Aminah was “disappointing”. Arihana’s photo was fabulous. The judges all went crazy for Holly’s photo. While the judges deliberated the 3 men hated Rosanagh’s picture but Sara liked it. Yanna had “so many [good] shots”. Aminah’s attitude was a concern (Eh?!) and was trying too hard. Bianca was “reveling in her insecurity” and hunched. Hillary only had one good photo. Holly – Cheesy girl next door.

Top this week was Yanna. Bottom two were Aminah and Briana. I have no idea why these two were in the bottom two apart from Aminah’s photo – but that was the awful make-up’s fault. They only thing that they had said about Briana’s photo was that she looked old. From what was discussed previously it should have been old one-shot Hillary or awful-photo-so-say-all-of-us Rosanagh. Even Sara seems to have been clutching for ideas as to why they are out because the explanation that she gave each of them was weak.

Aminah was eliminated and I am SHOCKED! Mistake NZNTM. Mistake.

Brigette, Amber, Aroha, Brianna, Yanna, Arihana, Bianca, Rosanagh, Aminah, Hilary, AJ, Tyne, Issy and Holly.

You can watch this episode online if you live in NZ by clicking here.

(*Pigalina & Magnum Ice-Cream stories* – When I went to St Tropez with my family Daddy Pigalina was shocked that my White Chocolate Magnum worked out to cost about ₤5 – which equates to around $15NZ! Then, one day when I was 11 me and a few friends, for some reason I cannot remember, went to town with our favourite teacher Ms Farrell. She said we could have an ice-cream. Guess which Magnum addicted child chose the most expensive ice-cream in the shop…)

P.P.S. Daddy Pigalina choo-choo-chooses Arihana too!

NZNTM Season 3 Episode 1

I missed season/cycle 2 of New Zealand’s Next Top Model as I was wintering in Europe with Mr Pigalina at Grandmama’s. I am back to blog it this season though and I promise to more conscise this time around.

Right-o then.

New Zealand’s Next Top Model Season 3, Episode 1.

They have stopped showing the audition stages, the same as on America’s Next Top Model (audition stages = comedy gold so why not show it?) so we start with 33 finalists who are to be whittled down to 13. My favourite is Arihana, a fiery red head with sleepy eyes, as she is from Dunedin – and has a good look too of course. There is also Amber D from Dunedin who is 6 foot tall. Aroha is the “plus size” model i.e the normal sized one. Rose on the other hand is anorexic looking. (She didn’t make it to the final 13 though which is pleasing). Bianca is the “quirky” one – can’t wear heels and wears big oversized black rimmed hipster glasses.

Sara met all of the girls outside the Waitangi Marae and gave a speech/pep talk (*Unnecessary Pigalina fact* I went to Waitangi, but it was closed so I only got as far as the gift shop front door). Then it was off on a boat trip with Colin and Teresa Moore (apparently an NZ model – she was wearing a very ugly dead sheep jacket thing BTW). The girls all had to bust out their best 3 top model poses for Colin and Teresa.

At the one-on-one interviews/auditions one girl didn’t know why she wanted to be on the show. Another likes “to do stuff” and Brianna just likes netball. Eden decided she didn’t want to be there anymore after wasting a space that a girl who did want to be there could have used. Tsk.
2 of the girls have unfortunate pasts. Claudia has a bit of a limp because she is the survivor of an accident where she and a friend were hit by a motorbike while on the beach at night. Claudia had her pelvis and both legs broken. Her friend didn’t survive :(. Brigette’s boyfriend died of an overdose a year ago.
Aminah is Muslim so may struggle with getting naked and other such things models have to do, though she didn’t seem worried.
Arihana – my heart sank when she walked in wearing two hula hoops. She was awesome at it though so all was forgiven.

History lesson time learning about tannery (leather making, not orange skin-a-fying) and printing with Professor Mathura-Jeffree at a colonial house. This was apparently because the girls were to find out if the colony of Top Model (yeah, I know) would accept them. (Not nearly as awful a theme as Tyra’s friending of people on her myfierce page). Lots of screams and squeals and tears of sadness and joy as the girls find out if they are in or out (wrong show sorry). At this point Chris Sisarich angered me by clearly saying conGRADulations. 1st photoshoot time! Pioneer woman themed (Ah, to tie in with before!). A few of them posed with a horse and Bianca posed with a pistol (or as she called it a “full rifle”).

Elimination time and the final 13 are:

Brigette, Amber, Aroha, Brianna, Yanna, Arihana, Bianca, Rosanagh, Aminah, Hilary, AJ, Tyne, and Isabel (Issy).

Next episode is MAKEOVER TIME!

(Apologies for any rubbish quality screen captures).
You can watch this episode online if you live in NZ by clicking here.

New Zealand’s Next Top Model – THE FINAL!

Well, here we are. Now what will I watch of an evening?
My friends G-Dogg and E-Boo (we all have interesting names here in Dunedin) told me to look out for Colin throwing lamingtons at the girls in this episode. (For those who aren’t up with the play lamingtons are cream filled squares of cake covered in coconut and an unknown substance that comes in both red and brown.)

So it’s down to the final 3. I know who I want to win (H) and I think I know who will win (C) – though having said let’s not forget that Adam didn’t win Idol and that Whitney won the last ANTM – both suprises. (In case you are wondering why my tenses tend to change from past to present and future throughout the post it is not because I am an ignoramus, it is because I blog as I watch. So, I’ll press play and begin). In the recap at the start I noticed that the girl I mentioned that cried in the first episode was poor old Hosanna and who was it picking on her? Teryl-Leigh of course! From right back then!

The girls all headed to the photo studio to shoot their 8 page editorial spreads for Cleo magazine. However, only the winner would get to see her full results – in the mag. I must mention Colin’s hair at this shoot, it looked fab and I might go and get it done for myself this week – finally the insipration I needed – and from a man! Chrisobelle was first wearing an 80s gold skirt, a see-through top, and chunky gold jewelery. She had to just walk around while the photographer took photos. She needed to open her eyes a bit. Laura wore a metallic sheet with belts tossed loosely round her shoulders like a seamstress would wear tapemeasures. She later used the belts as belts to belt in her sheet. Colin said that she looked like a supermodel, and I’ll have to admit that she did look the part. Hosanna wore a black dress and a fur jacket (which I hope was faux). The dress had tassles on the front of the top and on the bottom of the skirt which made her look like a bogan on a night out.
Christobelle then had a go with the sheet. She said that she knew the pose that she wanted to do but the photographer told her it was too complicated. Colin mentioned that it took a true model to work such an outfit and make it look like fashion. Laura then wore a gold tassled top that matched her hair and some gold undies. Hosanna wore a plum dress and Colin said she looked “magnificent”. Chris said that he isn’t even sure if Hosanna is aware that she is doing it but she has moments of “pure beauty” in between her poses.
Colin was very impressed with them all, not bitching, focussed on their work and he mentioned that Laura has grown into her makeover and it is almost as it that is how she always looked. Christobelle wore the gold tassled thing next, the gold skirt outfit looked terrible on Laura too. Only Hosanna got outfits all of her own.

Eek the Cat it was then time for panel – already! Only two would get to face off in the final runway. Colin wore an Indian prince gold hat and big earrings at panel. Trelise Cooper, NZ designer and one of the people the girls had to impress on their go-sees, was the guest judge.
(Bah! Just nipped to the shop and a stupid newspaper had the winner on the front. Not all of us watch it on the day you know!)
The girls then got questioned – Who most deserves to be Next Top Model and who has the least potential (harsh!). Hosanna said she should win and Laura should go, Christobelle said Hosanna should go and Laura said she should win and Hosanna should be sent home. Then they were shown a couple of their photos from the Cleo shoot. The judges all loved Christobelle’s photos, Colin told Hosanna that she looked like a supermodel, Laura’s first photo – in the gold outfit, was great – Trelise Cooper said it was the kind of photo that she would be looking for. Unfortunately that shot out shone her next. At deliberation they said Christobelle had a unique look, Laura probably wouldn’t have got as far without her makeover and Hosanna was the strongest commercial girl with a great personality. Hosanna and Laura were bottom two – Hosanna was sent home in tears. Nooooooooo Double-You Tee Eff! Why, after they had said Laura only got so far because they chopped her hair off and Trelise Cooper had said her white blotchy legs (like mine – that’s why they never see daylight) ruined her photo? Hosanna deserves it more! Boo.

Laura and Christobelle went home and were celebrating when Colin arrived with a large platter of lamingtons. He threw the lamingtons at them as they had started dinner without him, how they shrieked. Christobelle must be related to the princess from princess and the pea as she said “It actually really hurt, they were like hard lamingtons.” He then revealed the real reason he was there – runway practise. The next day the girls went on a boat ride to The Wharf which was the location for the final fashion show. All of the other girls were inside to walk in the show too – even Sarah “I don’t want to be a model”. New Zealand’s A-List (Petra Bagust was the only one I actually spotted) were there along with designers to watch. Christobelle strutted round the runway – like a panther stalking prey said Colin, Sarah said that C constantly amazes her. Laura said that she thought about how amazing she is as mental preparation, Colin said her eyes were piercing and that she had fantastic focus. T-L charged down the runway like she was in a hurry to get to an appointment with both arms swinging, not that it mattered what she did in that particular show. The girls had never had to change quickly for a show before so the pressure was on. On her second walk Laura slipped but carried on walking as if nothing had happened, Colin commented that her recovery was fantastic and Chris said a tiny slip wouldn’t mean she would lose.
Sarah and Colin said it was going to be hard to choose a winner, Colin said he was looking forward to getting into a fist fight over who should win. So, final deliberation time – They showed a series of photos to see how the girls have progressed from week one. They both had their good and bad shots but their last few weeks have both been high quality. Both girls were told that they had walked well in the final show and were then sent away while to judges discussed their decision. Chris said Christobelle is his favourite from a photographer’s point of view – more alluring and more compelling. Colin prefers Laura – “she is amazing”. Sarah asked them both about personalities, the only difference they could decide on was Christobelle is super determined for a 16 year old. When the girls were in LA Alexis Borges said he would sign Laura out of them all. The girls were then called back in and Christobelle’s photo popped up on the screen to announce her win. So for once I actually got it right!
(Daddy Pigalina thinks it was fixed, but that’s not for here).

Tiffany, Victoria, Christobelle, Ajoh, Rebecca Rose, Sarah, Rhiannon, Teryl-Leigh, Ruby, Olivia, Laura, Lucy and Hosanna
You can watch the episodes online (NZ only) and see the final photos by visiting here.

New Zealand’s Next Top Model Ep 12

(Before I start I must mention the excitement caused by a commenter named “Colin”. How the Pigalina house rang with squeals of delight! Even if it was not Colin M-J, as I will continue to tell myself it was, the fact that it was a real comment and not another spam link to some boobies was enough.)

There are only four girls left now and looking back I had picked three of them. I had Ajoh and Rebecca Rose firmly in the top five along with Ruby, Hosanna and Christobelle. I am glad to see Hosanna there as she has worked so hard and you’ve got to love Ruby for her cheerfulness. Ruby, Laura and Christobelle are staying in a tight group and are leaving Hosanna out. So the same as last week really except this week it is 3 against 1 instead of 4 against 1. This week they are moaning about her beating them in challenges and banging doors.
This week the girls had to face a journalist. She didn’t have much to trip anyone up on as they all handled the questions about who they fight with well. Ruby handled the inevitable weight “issue” question easily. The only real kicker was Laura being asked about her D.I.C charge! Not only announced on national TV but now splashed across the interweb (sorry).
They then got pampered at a spa with Nivea products. They paid no attention to the beauticians as they explained all the ingredients and properties of each product – fools! They were told in their Sara Mail that there was no such thing as a free lunch – or indeed a free facial. They said that they had paid attention to the Sara Mail but it seems not to the beauty therapists. They then had 30 seconds to sell one of the products to camera. What a disaster! The winner would get an advertorial in the next issue of Woman’s Day (thank you so much Colin for not pronouncing it Women’s Day like most other people!!) and one year’s supply of Nivea. Anyway as I was saying – disasterous. Laura waffled on about pushing your skin up and spoke for one minutes forty two seconds. Colin said it was like when “you vomit and can’t stop”. Hosanna started out well, she said that her beauty routine used to be soap and water but now she was mad on the Nivea toner. If she’d have stopped there it would have been great. However she also waffled on – “Unlike most toners that, sort of, leave your skin feeling like you’ve been burnt by acid or somethink; and you can smell alcohol on you when you walk into a room and people are like “has she been drinking?”” She was up there for one minute twenty one. Ruby tried but left Colin bored and thinking about what to eat for dinner – “I don’t eat dinner!” She did however clock in at 30 seconds and tried her hand at a slogan – “Beauty is feeling good, beauty is a smile.” Christobelle did a good job, she didn’t stray off the topic and was cheery and didn’t stumble over her words. She was only slightly over at forty eight seconds. Laura was voted last, Ruby was somehow third – below Hosanna and her ramblings! Colin said it was because it seemed like Ruby didn’t really want to win. The Nivea lady said that Hosanna and Christobelle were the two most believable – Christobelle won. I will have to pinch Mr Pigalina’s Mum’s Woman’s Day this week to see the ad (a lot of apostrophes there).
The photo challenge was at a boxing ring. It was a family reunion this week with the rastafarian Gok Wan (Atip) back again to style them and Bluto doing the make-up. The girls had to look like they were fighting in a boxing ring while wearing heels. Monty Beetham – boxer and league player, gave the girls some tips. The photographer didn’t think much of Christobelle who then left the set to go and do her Nivea advertorial. Laura was up next and was very pleased to get Hosanna to pretend to punch at. Maaaaaaaan I hope Hosanna wins. The other girls are getting catty! Chris said Laura seemed to have black cloud over her this week towards her competition; the photographer thought she was boring. Hosanna bounced around all over the show but Chris and the photographer said that she did a great job. Ruby had the best outfit (except the tasseled boots) but used more frames (possibly over 100) to get her shot.
At panel the girls were pretty sure Christobelle was going to be safe. This week Colin had his hair straightened and had extensions that from a distance brought to mind Beast in the terrible 80s programme Beauty and the Beast (or me before my yearly haircut). Atip was also judging. Gok Wan was in the country recently talking about how glasses are so awesome. Looks like Atip stole his Grandad’s glasses to rock the trend. Ruby looked tough in her photo and she looked tall and lean – not fat (so any mentions of weight are not valid this week – that means you Chris). Atip said that she had managed to channel warrior princess, Colin said she looked beautiful and athletic. Sara shot her down though by saying that it had taken too many frames to get such a great shot. Laura also had a great photo. It was interesting to see that they didn’t choose one where she had been pretending to punch Hosanna which she had taken to with such gusto. Christobelle looked a bit like an awkward robot in her photo. Colin said that she looked like she was at the supermarket deciding between Weetbix and Special K. Atip said that he had chosen the outfit especially for her and had hoped she would work it better than she did. Chris said she had energy on the day but that it hadn’t come through on film. Sara delivered a crushing blow by saying the photographer had been very disappointed and had looked through the film for a better shot but there wasn’t one. Hosanna was told that he photographer would book her again, Colin told her that she had a powerful shot. Atip told her that she nailed the shoot.
While deliberating they all praised Hosanna; Chris said Laura is almost self destructing by over thinking everything. Chris was worried that Ruby is cruising through and Atip said he probably wouldn’t book her as she wouldn’t fit the sample clothes. All four of them were disappointed in Christobelle.
Laura was called first. Sara told Laura that a few of the judges didn’t think that she should be called first (nor did I!). Ruby and Chrstobelle were bottom two. Christobelle was told her photo was average but she had won the Nivea challenge. Ruby was told her photo was OK but she had cruised in the Nivea challenge when she really could have won had she tried a little harder. Ruby was sent home 😦
I had a feeling that they wouldn’t get rid of Christobelle despite her poor photo. Next week is the final and all three girls take great photos (usually) so it could be anyone’s game. I would like Hosanna to win but I think Christobelle will. Who knows, maybe I will be pleasantly suprised.

Tiffany, Victoria, Christobelle, Ajoh, Rebecca Rose, Sarah, Rhiannon, Teryl-Leigh, Ruby, Olivia, Laura, Lucy and Hosanna
You can watch the episodes online (NZ only) and see the final photos by visiting here.

New Zealand’s Next Top Model Ep9

This week the 7 remaining girls were teamed up with 7 fashion design students. They had 10 minutes and $40 to buy what they could from Savemart. Savemart rocks, they are huge second hand clothing warehouses. (The only trouble with the one in Dunedin is it knows there is a big second hand clothing scene and bumps the prices up accordingly – especially in the “retro” (which usually is just their word for ugly) section). The designer would then use the clothes selected to create a look for their girl to wear on the runway. Hosanna raced around grabbing everything in sight but all her designer Celine wanted was a long sleeved white shirt and some ties. Laura was paired with Ivana who could have been in the model comp herself. Teryl-Leigh thought her designer was “way too sure of herself” for actually having an idea in her head that she was aiming for – she chose a Shrek T-shirt (tee hee).
Abby made Ruby a black and white futuristic Star Trek-alien-about-to-be-seduced-by-Kirk top.
Scott made Ruby a skirt out of a yucky green jacket she had insisted on having. The top however looked like a bit piece of cardboard. She did quite a good job of pretending that she liked it though.
Celine had made Hosanna a little purple top from the white shirt – it looked really great! Colin said it looked like an eggplant – Hosanna admitted she didn’t know what one was.
Lucy gave her designer Glenn a few pointers on improving his design – Colin ranted to camera that you “do not critique a designer’s design”.
April had turned some orange overalls into some black trousers for Victoria.
Ivana made Laura a dress out of some sheets and some kind of nanna shawl/cardie. I was just thinking the dress looked like a sheet still except all bunched up when Colin comented that “New Zealand loves pavlovas“.
Teryl-Leigh was horrified by the design Priyanka had crafted for her. It was some kind of top made out of 4 t-shirts. It looked like a big kind of shawl or one of those awful shrug cardigans but really oversized. T-L was to be topless underneath it for the show. T-L was not happy – “I’ve had two kids for crying out loud and the tops has holes all through it” Fair enough! Laura asked T-L if she thought that P was trying to make her look bad and therefore make herself look bad – T-L replied “She’s sewn together four frikkin t-shirts, I don’t think she cares.”
It was then time for the runway show – the model who did the best on the catwalk woud win a session of pampering at a spa. On the night of the show Priyanka was going to bow to T-L and sew the top up but Colin stopped her, labelling T-L a designer’s worst nightmare. When the girls were all done up and the outfits completed they all looked pretty good. Colin thought Victoria’s walk was stiff and Hosanna’s “horrified” him – she also winked at the end of the runway which he did not like at all. After all the drama T-L looked fine, she had a mesh-like top on under the t-shirt cardigan and you couldn’t even notice she was flying bra-less. Christobelle and Ruby were joint winners of the challenge. Christobelle had put her back to the camera at the end of the runway instead of posing for them to get a shot. A few of the girls were rightfully annoyed that she had won when she had messed up. They were whisked away in a Lexus to a hotel where they meditated, and then received a massage.

This week’s photoshoot was to support Smokefree. Instead of doing a photoshoot o show the bad things about smoking the shoot was designed to show how powerful the media can be in making things seem glamourous and real. The girls were each given an emotion to portray realistically in their photo – the cigarette was substituted by an emotion. The girls were done up 40s style, the golden age of the fag – that’s cigarette. Christobelle had to be angry but she just looked mildly irritated. Laura had to be sad – she imagned that her boyfriend was dead. As soon as Chris mentioned the scenario she just about bawled. She pictured his coffin and cried and cried. Chris was impressed, as was I – I love Mr Pigalina but as we have a deal that we will die simultaneously I am unable to picture such a scenario therefore unable to understand how she did it. Ruby’s emotion was joy and what was it that she hought of the bring the smile to her face? Was it kittens? Was it Johnny Depp down on one knee vowing to leave Vanessa Paradis for her? No, it was her friend faling off her chair at school and whacking her head on the desk – it seems we had to be there to appreciate the comedic gold. Teryl-Leigh had to be suprised, she just seemed to throw her hands up and open her mouth. I don’t know about you but when I am suprised I tend to screw my face up and hunch my shoulders to protect myself. (T-L was moaning about Hosanna practising her poses in the background – hogging her limelight. I had deleted something that I wrote about T-L whinging about Hosanna earlier in the episode but will give you the jist – T-L thinks that if Hosanna needs to practice so much she doesn’t deserve a place in the top 2 whereas other would just see it as dedication). Hosanna had to represent fear and she was embarrassed to admit that she was scared of the dark. Chris said that it would be hard to pick just one photo as she had done so many good ones. (Pratice makes…). Lucy had to represent despair. Victoria had to show lust.

The girls were told at this panel that they would need their passports as the final 6 were off overseas! (I had my fingers crossed that they got to go further than Australia however the end of the message said “Fair dinkum” so I gathered that TV3 had forked out $99 per girl to get them across the Tasman – turns out they were going to Sydney as I had expected – though, thank goodness, that it was only a pit-stop and all the cynics like me got a slap in the face when the girls were told they were off to LA. Lucky.) One poor girl had to fly to Sydney only to fly home again – who would it be? The guest judge this week was apparently Morgan McGlone, a talent scout for Next – though I think it was actually NZ singer Dei Hamo in disguise. Colin told Victoria that she looked like a lusty little minx and that that was how he looked at himself in the mirror every morning. If I earned money from just looking like me I would be licking the mirror each morning, alas I must earn my money as a public servant. Christobelle looked like she was ready for her close up as anger. Laura was told to be proud of her grief photo. Colin told her she had gone from ordinary to extraordinary and if she kept it up she would be legendary. Lucy was told her picture was not so great but her runway had been amazing. Ruby’s photo was fabulous – it made Colin’s heart sing and Dei Hamo Morgan said it was exceptional. Sara congratulated T-L for actually going ahead and modelling her outfit at the fashion show. T-L had a wee cry about missing her kids and the judges were pleased as “barriers were breaking down”. It was then time to deliberate. Colin declared Ruby the dark-horse – yay Ruby!
Ruby was called first – and rightly so. Hosanna and Lucy were in the bottom two – out of the two, though I wanted Lucy to go further to represent Dunedin, Hosanna deserved it more. Lucy was sent thus dashing Dunedin’s dream of model glory.

Next week it’s off to LA!

New Zealand’s Next Top Model Ep4

Again I am posting late – had to commission Mr Pigalina to get some screen-shots for me. (Thanks Mr Pigalina xoxox – “Make my hair blonder” he was heard to mimic. “Have a cry”. “Oh she looks a million times better”. I think he secretly enjoyed his task). Soooo, by request this post features pictures! Woot!
This week was makeovers in case you couldn’t tell from the commentary above. Makeover week is always fun and there were tears and grumpy faces as huge fat fringes were demolished, hair shorn off against cultural norms and hair lightened to look “grey”. Fair enough for Ajoh – she said that in her culture girls only shave their heads when something bad has happened such as a death in the family. She does look good now though, thanks to her eyes. Lucy bawled her eyes out – seriously – but she looks way better as you will see below (her sister Olivia said “I reckon it looks amazing. I don’t know what the fricking drama was about.” Exactly). Hosanna asked the hairstylist what kind of look he thought she had. He replied “Mediterranean” and she asked if that was near South America, he just chuckled and replied yes. Tee Hee! Teryl-Leigh moaned about her hair being orange and had nothing positive to say about the colour which is actually a chestnutty brown. (She also has it in for Hosanna – making snide little comments about her. I hope she stops the moaning because she started out as one of my favourites.) Christobelle was annoyed because she thought she looked better before. She looks the same to me. There were no weaves for the kiwi girls so no 8 hour stints unlike on ANTM.
Below are before and after photos of each girl (click to enlarge):


All the girls insist that they have put on weight in the house, not that you can tell. Hosanna insists she has put on 4kgs! To help combat this Ruby ran a jazzercise class including undies over tights and big t-shirts for all involved. Exercise equipment was also delivered much to their delight.

The first challenge was to wear ugly clothes while walking and posing on the moving walkway at Kelly Tarlton’s Underwater World (an indoor aquarium). Sorry no photos but just picture wide square shoulders, icky tapered pants all baggy at the thigh circa 1985 and Ajoh looked like she was wearing a sheet with a hole cut in it, knotted in the middle. (Some were ok but most of them…) Teryl-Leigh commited a faux pas by admitting she hadn’t really seen the outfit she was wearing. Laura commented that her outfit was comfy. Apparently you can’t do that. Clothes must only be described as glamourous and sexy. Tell that to my “lady day” undies. Christobelle won the challenge and got a $1000 wardrobe from Max.

The photo challenge was a headshot where each girl had their faces painted to look like tropical fish – bright colours, sequins etc. Except Ruby who just got blacked up – no sequins, no other colour – the make-up artist must have been over it by the time Ruby got in the chair.

Colin toned it down hair-wise this week. I really like him, he is one of the best things about the show. He is pleasant and amusing, yay for Colin.
There are 4 girls whose names escaped me while naming the photos – they are Rhiannon, Christobelle, Laura and Victoria – they need to step up their games! I should remember Christobelle after her win at Kelly Tarlton’s this week but we shall see. At panel Hosanna was praised and told that her pratice had paid off. Teryl-Leigh was told she is getting lazy. Ruby’s photo came out really well, the simplicity of the single colour was what made it so good – no feathery eyelashes and beaded eyebrows to distract. Sara seems to have the over-riding say in who stays and who goes now that I watch the episode back (“You’re the boss” “Yes I am” could be the biggest hint). Colin and the photographer both loved and hated the same photos and Sara would often disagree. It was one of these photos that she alone disliked that sent today’s girl home.
Rebecca Rose was called first and told that she was the best this week. Olivia and Teryl-Leigh were in the bottom two with Olivia sent home – Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Her departure was even mentioned in the Otago Daily Times – Dunedin’s daily news. Only one Dunedinite left to cheer on now, though it may take me a while to get over the hair meltdown, sorry Lucy.

Tiffany, Victoria, Christobelle, Ajoh, Rebecca Rose, Sarah, Rhiannon, Teryl-Leigh, Ruby, Olivia, Laura, Lucy and Hosanna

New Zealand’s Next Top Model Ep1!

Nu Zild has finally go its own version of Top Model. When I heard about the auditions and that they were actually coming to Dunedin I was rather excited and planned on going along for a joke (and maybe, just a little, to try my luck). Imagine my horror when I found out that I was two years too old. I suppose it is just as well, office arse and a wine and sugar addiction would have seen me placed in the “plus size” category. There’s no way “the robot” would have been an acceptable dance for the Sexy Dancing Montage either.
So, I took my place on the sofa instead to watch the premiere episode. Even Mr Pigalina is keen to watch the series – though he may not be pleased I have told you.
One thing I did notice straight away is that it is a lot more polished than I had expected. It is 10 times more professional looking than the awful Britain’s Next top Model that was buried on TV3 at a Saturday lunchtime last year. Also the girls are a lot kinder to each other than in America’s Next Top Model. Only one girl was reduced to tears last night and others rushed to comfort her. On America’s Next Top Model they often get up in each other’s face screaming “hoochie” and “ghetto bitch” and almost come to blows. Time will tell however…
I must mention the judges – who are they?!
Where’s Rachel Hunter? Where’s Kylie Bax? Or Nicky Watson? Who is the long haired Mr Jay-alike and who the heck is Sara Tetro? A quick Google search will reveal that lately she is a judge on New Zealand’s Next Top Model. I know I would prefer to be told I looked like a sausage bursting its skin and walked like a two legged dog if I knew the judge had any experience themselves. Anyway, shhhhh, lets not be mean and appreciate that we have some local ladies to cheer on.
I am naturally cheering for Olivia and Lucy, the sisters from Dunedin. Yayayayayay. (They need to lay off Olivia about her nose ring though, don’t make her a clone!) I also like Ajloh – long legs, good walk, looks lovely in white; and Teryl-Leigh – girl looks hot for a mum of two. (She should drop one of the names though). Rebecca Rose looks to be a strong contender, though she has experience.
May I say they were brave one and all for getting into the, no doubt, icy Lake Wakatipu in next to nothing.

I was sad to see Frankie and her awesome blonde afro out so early. It’s a shame that they got rid of someone so unique looking straight away. Shame too about Tori and her “big bangers” as Gok Wan would say. Everyone else is a little ironing-boardish and she seemed quite fun and cheerful.
Poor Jordanna from Timmers and her terrible walk. She walks like I do if I suddenly think people are watching me, all awkward – she did alright for her first time in heels though and didn’t lose a shoe – unlike someone else.
Looks like Hosanna is being lined up to be “the bitch” – she’s just dedicated.

Interesting to see not a hint of “plus size” in Zild’s Next Top Model.

The final 13 are: Tiffany, Victoria, Christobelle, Ajoh, Rebecca Rose, Sarah, Rhiannon, Teryl-Leigh, Ruby, Olivia, Laura, Lucy and Hosanna.

I’m looking forward to crossing a name off each week and seeing who will be New Zealand’s Next Top Model. Word.